Keys to Forgiveness

Feeling like the anger and bitterness towards someone who has done you wrong is eating away at you?

Feeling so undervalued, disrespected and unappreciated?

Anger is so time consuming and energy zapping.  Your body is in pain, your muscles spasm, your head hurts, you either over eat, or can’t eat, can’t sleep or even function like a rational human being.

Sometimes/often you may let that anger and hurt out and you sound and behave like a raging monster being unleashed from within.

You’ve got good reason to be feeling so terrible at times.  You are not who you want to be.  You are not being the person that makes you feel good inside.  Your power is being handed over to the other person.

Read on to master the keys to letting go of the hurt and being true to your happiness.  Letting go will alleviate the anxiety that builds inside, will relieve those feelings of hurt and frustration.

🗝 KEY 1
Your well aware of the importance of letting go and moving on.  And knowing the reason you are suffering is because of the attachment is the first key to your overall peace and success here.

You’ve heard the saying energy goes, where energy is put.  So focusing on stress, anger, negatives – that’s what you’ll get.  So you know what’s next – if you are focusing on being positive and love, everything that is good (because let’s face it there is always good) will bring you positive, happy & good feelings.

You cannot focus on a problem and find a solution – but focusing on the solution will find a solution, or many in fact.

🗝 KEY 2
Resentment is such a heavy weight to carry.  What would you prefer to carry?  Imagine yourself being like water, dissolving the resentment like crystals, or floating it away.  Manipulate that resentment, play with it like a balloon – allowing it to float away or pop it with a pin.

🗝 KEY 3
Embrace curiosity over shame.  Be curious about your behavior, feelings.  Be curious about how you want to feel, think, behave.

Often what we see in others is a reflection of ourselves.  That does not mean that we are like them or have the same behaviour as them – it just means if something irks
you about them there is something inside of you that needs attention (by you).  So stop blaming others and focus on understanding yourself.

You always do the best you can, with the skills you have at the time.  So then if your best is not good enough at that time, your skills need to change.  More on that later.

🗝 KEY 4
More importantly though – everyone only ever operates to the best of their ability, with the skills THEY have at the time.  When you think about that – this means those who have hurt or caused you pain, sadly really don’t know any different – WOW when you really give thought to that, THAT IS REALLY SAD FOR THEM, that they don’t know any different, they don’t know how to behave any different, they don’t know how to think any different.  Wow how unfortunate for them.  With empathy behind you – you know have more skill to be able to

Stop being like them with these limiting skills, limiting behaviours, limiting beliefs.  More importantly stop imposing your own values and beliefs onto others.  If you are feeling like you are not being heard, or being disrespected, maybe stop and and see if you are having the need to tell people what to do.

🗝 KEY 5
Lastly stop looking for reasons to be unhappy, hurt, disrespected, annoyed with how you are being treated.  Just stop looking.  What I mean by this is we can tend start to see things that maybe aren’t fully there, but we can start to see them and then wow there is that energy again.  Start seeing the love for you, the love for others, really open those eyes and start looking.  You will be amazed at what you find. ❤

VALUES

This is the reason you are struggling emotionally and feeling undervalued…And the feelings of anxiety and stress are coming up, making you feel horrible.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful, if we lived our lives, full of passion and purpose? To wake each day, feeling happy and alive! Excited and motivated to live the day with the greatest capacity?

Wouldn’t it be completely fulfilling, to work and play in line with what you truly value?

Creating passion and purpose in our lives can be absolutely achievable, when we become really aware of our personal values.

What is it specifically, that you value? Is it Family? Career – change and variety, meaningful work, achievement? Creativity and Fun? Health and Fitness? Work/Life Balance? Something else? Becoming clear about what you really value is the first step toward achieving a fulfilling life and getting rid of the anxiety that builds up in side or worse hits you all of a sudden. When you start making daily choices around how you spend your time based on what you really value – your whole being is aligned and working at its optimum. Are you spending too much time doing things that you don’t value at all or worse still, make you feel undervalued? Are you spending enough time, if any, doing the things that you do value and that does make you feel valued? Shifting what you do – so you spend more time doing the things you value – creates fulfilling, happy days … creates passion and purpose around your daily lives and helps eliminate the anxiety that builds up inside subconsciously.

Where do you see yourself in time to come? Say at the end of the year, in 2 year’s time, in 5 year’s time? What do you want? Having a clear vision around what you want for yourself, in your life, creates an open door to begin walking through. Is your vision in line with your true values? Knowing where you want to go is the first step towards realizing it. When you know what you want, you can then start to align your daily actions toward achieving your vision. Are you spending your days doing activities that are not in line with your vision? Are you doing and being what and who you need, to live in line with what you want? Truly living in line with your values?

So, having a clear vision of what you want and knowing what you value in life are amazing skills to hold, so that on a daily basis, you can act in line with these. Understanding and knowing these will help you create passion and purpose in your life.

BUT most importantly it will help eliminate the anxiety and stress that is consuming your mind and body. That’s got to be worth it! More to the point YOU’VE got to be WORTH IT.

So, who do you need to be, to do what you need to do, to have passion and purpose in your life?

Life Fulfilment Coaching & Hypnotherapy have a 4 step program which eliminates Stress, Anxiety & Fear and supports you to recognize your values and live life true to your values.

Prioritise Your Time

We all lead very busy lives. We just have too much to do and not enough time in which to do it. The result is that we end up stressed. This month I want to share with you some of the things I do to manage my time.

BE REALISTIC
There really are only 24 hours in a day. You have to sleep, eat, exercise and relax as well as meeting all your commitments. So be realistic in what you can do and do not take on more tasks than is humanly possible.

LEARN TO SAY
“No – Unfortunately I’m not in a position to do that” or “No – sorry I do not have the time!”

DELEGATE
If you are in a business and you have staff under your control, make sure you delegate. In your household – delegate.
Sounds easy ….but is often hard because you think it is easier to do it yourself than take the time to train someone else.
Remember we all had to learn sometime. And what a great opportunity you are giving your staff and family members to learn, develop, grow and feel great about achieving new things. People like to feel needed and responsible.

PRIORITISE
Schedule time first thing in the morning or last thing the previous day to jot down those things you have to do and then prioritise it. This becomes your action worksheet. Commence working from the most important task down so that by the end of each day, you have made significant inroads into the most important items on your list.

DO NOT PROCRASTINATE
It is easy to jump over an item that you would rather not do – most of us are tempted to do this from time to time. The skill is to ignore the impulse to skip the task and just knuckle down and do it. You really will feel better for doing it. I have some great tools that can support you further with this.

So there it is – 5 simple steps to optimising your time.
Try it and let me know how you go!

Stress and Relax

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked “how heavy is this glass of water?”

He continued “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, you might have to get an ambulance.”

He Continued “and that’s the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on. As with the glass of water, we have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.”

So we all need to find time to put our burdens down and relax

 

Here are some steps to help you relax

1. Make time to relax each day.

2. Get comfortable. Sit or lie down and close your eyes

3. Imagine a soothing restful scene e.g.: bush or beach

4. Start to relax all the muscles in your body by tensing and then relaxing them.

5. Begin with your toes and work through your body until every muscle is relaxed.

6. Next, concentrate on your breathing—slow and deep, slow and deep.

7. Clear your mind by only concentrating on your breathing

8. Spend at least 15 minutes on the above each day.

If you would like to discuss creating the time to relax and more relaxation techniques —please give me a call.

Click to contact me

2018 Full Steam Ahead

Mid January already…Where have the past three weeks gone !!!??? Have you noticed that the older we get the quicker the years seem to go? Possibly a result of our ever increasingly busy lives.

I hope you had a great Christmas and New Year – I certainly did. The New Year is always a time for reflection and planning. Planning our dreams and aspirations for the coming year…or more. I hope that whatever New Year’s resolutions you chose, you have achieved ….or you are still on track to achieve them.

Give me a call for tips on how to keep focused and motivated.

So what does 2018 hold for you?
Through these blogs, I want to share some of my thoughts with you on what we can do to make our lives awesome.

Healthy Mind = Healthy Body

I honestly believe that a healthy mind is the key to a healthy body. In fact, statistics show that the majority of medical dollars are spent treating disease, and most experts believe 90% of diseases are due to stress.
Reduce stress and your health improves because you significantly reduce your chances of disease.

So what is STRESS ?

Stress is not the challenges we face in our lives, it is the way we react physically and mentally to these challenges.

Give me a call if you would like to discuss this further

Coaching

Dejavu – are you still where you were this time last year.

“LIFE REWARDS ACTION”

What’s holding you back? – Get a coach to move you!

 

Our 4 Step S.A.F.E. program is your key to success.

 

Having a coach gives you an edge over someone without a coach – in your career, in your business and in your personal life.

Having a coach means having an edge.  An edge that will have you steps ahead of others.

An edge that gives you strength, direction, confidence, and empowerment to handle anything in your business and personal life.  

An edge that will drive you forward into life, maximising your fulfilment and happiness.

 

The Benefits include:

  • Emotional Intelligence and Empowerment to really be YOURSELF
  • Increased Work Success and Direction
  • Improved Financial abilities
  • Better Relationships with all those around you
  • Spiritual awareness
  • Intellectual Empowerment
  • Improved Intimacy and Connection
  • Increased Physical Wellbeing

 

Book your coaching sessions now!

Click to move forward and achieve your goals!

 

Fear & Excuses

Right now I am going through a huge change in my life. It is a very exciting time but also a demanding and challenging time. At the forefront is the fear of the unknown, fear of just “what have I let myself in for?”, fear of not succeeding, fear of what others will think.

Oh it would be so easy to just find all the excuses why I should do something else. I could easily convince myself that I don’t have the skills, that I don’t need the angst in my life, that it is all just too hard, that for whatever reason it would be easier to do something else.

Have YOU ever faced a fear and then looked for excuses to avoid facing the issue?
Here are some steps to help you face those fears and avoid making excuses:

  • Accept that making excuses is not being true to yourself, family or friends.
  • Focus on your goals and believe in yourself to achieve them.
  • Realise that you have the power to think and feel how you want to.
  • Make a commitment to take FULL responsibility for your life. That means no more blaming anything or anyone. Not your fear, not your parents, not your circumstances, not your spouse, not your children, and certainly not your age.
  • Get inspired. Associate with people who inspire you, who are a good influence on you.
  • Appreciate YOU. Take time every day to appreciate your innate gifts.
  • Fake it till you make it. Pretend to believe, stay POSITIVE and eventually you will BELIEVE & BE.
  • Just do it! As Nike says, stop making excuses and take a small step today. Not tomorrow. TODAY.

As for me. Well I accepted the challenge, overcame my fear and I am now enjoying the fruits that the change has brought to my life. You can do it too.

Life Rewards Action!!

7 Steps to Making Achievable Goals

As we approach the end of the year, most of us stop and reflect on the past 12 months and then we turn our thoughts to the future.

We think about our dreams and aspirations but often we don’t go any further. We just plod along as we have done over the years, hoping that ‘something’ will happen to make our lives more enjoyable, more fulfilling.

What if you could do the one thing that would change all this and set you up for success and happiness.

Now is the time to take those dreams and aspirations and turn them into reality. But often it is not that easy. Most people need assistance to guide them through the many issues in their lives so that they achieve their goals.

Don’t leave it another minute, make you matter the most.

7 Steps to Making Achievable Goals

1. Dream

2. Focus

3. Visualise

4. Be Specific

5. Action Plan

6. Commit

7. Enlist the support of your Coach

 Book free strategy call NOW

Why the BLACK Swan?

I’ve always had a connection with the Black Swan ever since I was little, growing up in Western Australia and being a lover of dance.  For me the Black Swan represents beauty, grace, strength, freedom, peace and love.

So imagine my pleasure when researching the meaning and theory of the Black Swan.

The Black Swan theory is a metaphor that describes an event that comes as a surprise, has a major impact to our lives, and is rationalised after the fact with the benefit of hindsight.

The Black Swan symbolises loyalty, strength, artistry, grace and beauty.  Invoking happiness in yourself and others.  The joy and freedom in serving another.  The Black Swan represents the healing powers of love and romance.

The Black Swan represents miracles and a great capacity to open us up to healing properties of love and in turn happiness, being aware that the only person who can give happiness to you is YOU.  The Black Swan signifies an insight about yourself which changes your position from one of victim to victor.  Remember – these guys have no natural predators, so you are safe!

Sometimes we just feel like CRAP!

Ok so some days we just feel like crap and can’t really pinpoint why. We all have ups & downs.

But I’m talking about those days when it all just feels too hard, consuming, like your drowning.

 

From my experience, this feeling can usually be attributed to one or more of the following.  Do you know why I know this? Because I’ve felt like crap many times in my life and through experience I have learnt to check in on:

Negative Self Talk

Stop with your negative self-talk. When something crappy happens, it’s easy to get on the “I’m stupid” or “I’ll never be good enough” wagon.

Be kind to yourself and turn that negative talk into positive talk. Get it down on paper, cross out the negative and repeat the opposite (the positive). Keep repeating till that inner crappy feeling starts to subside.

Lack of Sleep

Not enough sleep or broken sleep can affect you more than you realise. Not just health wise, but in your relationships. You’ll become impatient with yourself and others, you’ll make poor decisions.

Poor Diet

Low in energy, health being challenged, not getting enough enjoyment out of life – you are what you eat!  Not eating well and being aware of what you are putting in your body to fuel yourself ONLY affects you and your loved ones.

Lack of Fitness

Exercise is not only good for your body, but excellent for your mind.

The endorphins released when exercising is better than any chocolate for immediate and long term satisfaction.

Not enough Downtime or ME time

You need to get away, take your mind off work and the responsibilities at home, and relax.  Relaxation might just be resting out in the sunshine (remember slip, slop, slap), or maybe doing other activities and hobbies that bring you enjoyment.

Getting out in nature or rugging up with a good book (you’ve been meaning to read) – it’s YOUR time.

Even if you live to work – downtime is essential to a balanced and happy life.

Your Priorities are out of order

Life’s not happening the way you want – no shit! Take a step back and have a good look at what you are doing.

This is such a big one that you don’t even realise is affecting the every minute and hour of your day.

When you are always juggling a million things, of course you’re going to feel like crap.

Is multi-tasking really getting more things done or just loading you up?

Having a list in order of importance/urgency, but let’s get real about what is really urgent or even important.

Sometimes less is best!

Lack of laughter

If you’re feeling like crap, I wonder how long it’s been since you had a really good laugh.

Dad jokes, kids jokes, animal videos, babies laughing – whatever it is that tickles your fancy!!

Not enough human connection

Feeling isolated?  Even with people around you!

Take responsibility for your connections or lack there of.  Meet-up groups, hobbies, it just takes a smile and one person to start a conversation.

Hanging out with the wrong people

Having said the above, maybe isolation is not your problem, maybe being surrounded by the wrong people is more the issue!

Overly negative people, people who constantly want to have an opinion on your life.  If the connection is not making you feel good – how supportive of your health is that really?

Not doing what you should be doing

You know that constant niggling feeling that you are just not living your life’s purpose.

Having trouble getting up in the morning or not being able to focus.  Maybe you get bored or distracted often.

Listen to that message your mind and body is trying to tell you.

Getting back to what it is that really makes your heart sing – you know what it is!  If you don’t you can get support to find that out.  Click to contact me!

When all else fails – Surrender your CRAP!!

Write, journal, get it all out on paper.  Whilst is it mulling around in your head it becomes overwhelming.  Get it out of your head, and get it on paper.